The best way to deal with online dating rejection from women

The best way to deal with online dating rejection is simple; move on. Let it go! Don't dwell on it and certainly don't lash out at women. Venting at a woman for not responding to your message is low class and only proves she was right in the first place.

Here's a fact; every guy gets rejected. It doesn't matter if you approach a woman at a bar, in a store, on the street, or a dating site. Women will reject you. The problem on dating sites is many guys lash out at women for not responding, or worse, when a woman tells a guy, he isn't her type.

Rejection sucks and hurts sometimes, but there are things you can do to deal with it. Here are a few things you should do when a woman rejects you on a dating site.

Never insult women for not responding.

Women don't owe you a response. It doesn't matter how long you took to craft your message. Once you send a message to a woman, she is under no obligation to respond.

Once you send a message, let it be. Don't take it personally if a woman doesn't respond, and never send an angry message like this guy did to a friend of mine on POF:

Here's a woman who told me I was too short for her on Match.com. Instead of arguing or insulting her like many guys, I wished her luck and moved on.

Who knows, a woman who rejects you may think you are better suited for a friend; I had this happen a couple of times. On the flip side, you might lash out a woman who could report you to your dating site and get you banned.  

I don't care what your match% is with someone or how perfect you think a woman is for you; some women won't be interested. It's as simple as that. So take the high road and move on.

Take a look at yourself.

Many men point the finger at women for rejecting them when they should look at themselves first. I've heard it all from guys; "all women care about is looks," "they're fake," or "you must be rich to meet an attractive woman online," and so on.

Look at rejection this way; women are giving you feedback. Women might ignore you because your profile isn't good or your messages stink. You won't start many conversations if you send messages like this to women:

Also, if you have a profile full of cliches or show a lack of effort, how can you expect to meet anyone? Take this guy; he offers zero insight into his passions, interests, and goals.

The effort you put into your profile shows women how serious you are about finding a relationship. If women across the board aren't responding to your message that's a surefire sign something in your profile or messages is off-putting.

Give your profile a tune-up from time to time and try different approaches in messages. Swap photos out and update your profile with recent accomplishments or things you've done. If you've recently gone on a vacation, add a few sentences about it on your profile.

For profile and message tips visit these pages on my blog:

1.  How To Take Good Dating Profile Photos For Men
2.  10 Things Men Should Never Write On Their Dating Profile
3.  How To Create A Good Dating Site Username
4.  10 Online Dating Profile Headline Tips for Men
5.  3 Good Conversation Starters for Online Dating Messages To Women

Make sure you're focusing on the right women.

You may spare yourself rejection if you're focusing on the right women. It seems like a no-brainer, but a lot of guys choose to send messages to women whom they don't match up with.  

If you're on a site like Match or Zoosk, use their filtering tools, and search for women who are seeking the same thing you are. For example, if you want kids, you shouldn't be sending messages to women who don't want children.  

Focusing on women you match with seems like common sense, but guys don't do this. Most men send messages to women based solely on looks and nothing else. 

I wanted to see for myself how bad it was for women, so I went undercover and created a female profile on POF a few years ago. 155 men sent messages to my fake account over three days, and a huge percentage didn't read one word on the woman's profile. You can check it out here:  I Went Undercover As A Hot Girl On A Dating Website. Here’s The Results.

Make sure women you're interested in share common interests. Also, this goes back to my first point above, your profile better damn well show women you have things in common. Don't expect women to respond if you send a message saying, "We have common interests!" Your profile photos and self-summary must prove you have similar interests with women.

Find someone else because you got options!

Don't pin your hopes on one woman. I've seen too many guys find their so-called "perfect match" on a dating site, and create this fantasy that she is perfect for them. These guys send several messages, or constantly check their inbox looking for a response to their message or stalk women online checking if their "perfect match" is online or looked at their profile.

If you find someone you're interested in, send her a message and leave it at that. There's no need to send a woman several messages like this guy:

You'll set off a woman's "creep" factor and lose any chance of a response. Some women aren't as active on dating apps as others. I've met many women who check their inbox maybe once or twice a week while others are on apps daily. 

There are millions of women online and tons of dating apps. If you're on OkCupid, and can't meet women, try Match or POF. Maybe you can't catch a break on Tinder; try Hinge or Bumble instead. You won't believe how many women are on these apps, so you have plenty of options.

Take a break from online dating.

If you get angry because a woman didn't respond to your message, there might be something else that needs addressing. Take your frustration out at the gym, talk to a close friend or family member, get off the dating site, or take a break from online dating itself.  

There's nothing wrong with putting online dating on hold. Delete your profile, uninstall the app, and focus on something else. I've done this numerous times.  It's been as short as a few days to as long as months.  You'll know when it's time to re-enter the dating pool again.

Final Thoughts

Rejection on dating sites only hurts if you let it. As soon as you sign up, know that you will be ignored by some women. You aren't everybody's ideal partner.

So how do you deal with online dating rejection? Don't dwell on it and let it go. Take a look at your profile and messages. It might be time to fix your dating profile and come up with new message approaches.

Don't overreact. If you find yourself writing an angry message to a woman who didn't respond; get off your computer or put the phone down. Delete your message and take a break.

Remember, there is always someone else online who hasn't had the opportunity to meet you. Focus on finding her.

How do you deal with online dating rejection?  Leave your answers below.