The Top 7 Pet Peeves For Women On Dating Apps
Top pet peeves on dating apps for women include a lack of effort, negativity, bad photos, and terrible icebreakers.
Below are 7 of the biggest issues women have with men on dating sites. Check that you aren't making any mistakes. Just one will negatively impact your results.
Yes, women are guilty of these pet peeves as well. That doesn't justify your use of them, however.
1. Lack of effort in men's written section.
Your bio's goal is to paint a picture of who you are to women viewing your bio. This is where you share your lifestyle, passions, interests, etc.
Unfortunately, a common problem is men share nothing about themselves. Too often, men do lists, "I love traveling, am active, enjoy wine, and Netflix." Where's the depth?
It's OK to list these topics, but explain why you enjoy them. Just listing things shows a lack of effort.
Even worse are men who write things like "I don't know what to write here" or "I suck at writing about myself." Comments like these are a terrible first impression. Women love men who take charge and are confident, so don't hesitate to share who you are.
It's the little idiosyncrasies about yourself that help you stand out on dating apps. Share your uniqueness – what makes you, YOU. Your bio will stand out doing this.
For tips on your bio, visit my blog post, What Is A Good Dating Profile Example For Men.
Women dislike men's profiles with zero depth.
2. Negativity in men's dating profiles.
A huge no-no on dating apps is using negative statements in your dating profile. You want women smiling as they read your bio.
Including negative statements in your bio is a huge-turnoff with women. 36% of women polled on Word Tips found negativity to be a turnoff.
Too often, men are unaware of the damage they are doing to their results by including negativity. Here are a few common phrases men use:
- "I'm not here for games or drama."
- "If you're (X), swipe left."
- "Not into (X), (Y), or "Z"
- "I'm not looking for (X)."
Your bio should highlight your strengths and have a positive vibe. The statements above show that you're angry, jaded, and insecure. You won’t fare well if women think you’re a jerk.
Plentyoffish found users with positive identifiers in their profile receive 23% MORE incoming messages. Always keep your bio 100% positive.
Negativity is never attractive to women.
3. Bad profile photos.
The first thing women judge you on is your portfolio. You must use a variety of photos showing different aspects of your life.
Another blunder men make on dating apps is using bad photos. Common photo mistakes men make make:
- Using only one photo.
- Just headshots - no full-body photos.
- Face filters (Snapchat).
- Wearing sunglasses and/or hats.
- Group photos where women can't figure out which guy is you.
- Using pictures you aren't in (quotes, vehicles, pets).
All you really need to do is add some photos of yourself smiling. Throw in a couple of full-body pictures and pics of yourself doing a couple of hobbies.
Make sure you smile in your photos as well. It’s the first thing women look at in your pictures.
For photo tips, visit my blog post, What Are Good Dating Profile Photo Tips For Men.
4. Bad opening messages.
Maybe the biggest pet peeve for women on dating apps is men's terrible opening messages. All too often, guys resort to what I like to call "elevator talk."
Elevator talk is something you say to someone in an elevator. "Hello," "Hi there," and "How are you today" are prime examples. Don't use these types of opening messages.
If a woman takes the time to write something about herself, your best chance for a response is asking a question about something in her bio. Women appreciate it when a guy shows curiosity.
Hinge found, "the best way to get a response is to ask a direct question about your match's profile while sharing your interests."
Tinder found 70% of women want your message to show curiosity. Yes, even on Tinder, women want you to ask about something they write in their bio.
Looking for more help with icebreakers? Visit my blog post, What Are Good Online Dating First Message Tips For Men?
A huge pet peeve for women is men who put no effort into their icebreakers.
5. Seeing clichés in bios.
A cliché is defined as an overused phrase. Boy, there are a lot of them on dating apps. No doubt you see women use them all the time in their profiles.
Avoid clichés at all costs. Examples of common clichés you find in men's profiles include:
- "Fluent in sarcasm..."
- "I love to laugh..."
- "My kids come first..."
- "I love going out but enjoy Netflix nights in..."
- "Looking for my partner in crime..."
- "Work hard play hard..."
The examples above show a complete lack of original thought. They are the tip of the iceberg - there are a ton of clichés men use.
You may not realize you use them in your bio. Give your profile a read through and remove all clichés from your bio. It may sound cheesy, but don’t be afraid to write your bio in your own words.
6. Ghosting.
A common problem with dating apps for both men and women is ghosting. Ghosting is basically pulling a vanishing act. You're swapping messages with a woman, and then you're gone. No reasons. No follow-up. Nada.
It's OK to lose interest, and if you aren't feeling it, you can simply say, "Sorry, I don't think we're a match. Best of luck." That's that. It's better to let a woman know then leave her hanging.
And yes, women are guilty of ghosting men. That doesn’t justify you doing the same thing to them.
7. Men sending phone numbers in their icebreakers.
I'm shocked how many men send their phone numbers in their opening message. This is a huge blunder and one of the major pet peeves on dating apps.
There's no reason to send a woman your phone number in your icebreaker. It's forward, creepy, and doesn’t work.
You should only swap numbers AFTER you establish some sort of connection with a woman. There should be a natural ebb and flow in your conversation.
Never send your phone number in your icebreaker.