7 First Date Mistakes You Must Avoid
First impressions are critical on a date! Make your’s count and don’t blow your chances by making blunders. Here’s a list of 7 of the worst first date mistakes guys make which CRUSH any hope for a second date.
Yes, first dates can be nerve-wracking. Women judge everything. Your actions, words, appearance, and everything else are under a microscope. Make one mistake and it’s game over.
Don’t end your date with the dreaded handshake or the token hug. If you want a second date, avoid any of the first date mistakes below which can doom your chances for that second date.
1. Lack of Confidence
The biggest mistake you can make is to be agreeable, wishy-washy, or appear weak. According to Match.com, 84% of women will routinely watch you for your confidence level.
Keep a confident mindset throughout the date:
- Sit erect.
- Absolutely no slouching.
- Maintain eye contact but don’t be creepy.
- Challenge her but don’t be confrontational.
- When ordering appetizers or drinks don’t ask her what she’s having before making a decision for yourself.
For example, as you look over the menu ask her if she’s allergic to anything or what food she dislikes. Once you know, say, “OK, let’s order a couple of appetizers. I’ll choose one and you choose one.” Then you choose what you want and let her choose the other.
Women love men who make a decision and are assertive. Even if you aren’t naturally confident, fake it until you make it.
2. Not Smiling
When you meet flash those pearly whites. 81% of women will judge you by your smile. You know you should floss and brush regularly; so do it. It matters to women.
If your teeth are the color of margarine it’s time to whiten your teeth. If teeth whitening by your dentist is too expensive you can buy a home whitening kit or at least some strips for a temporary fix.
Be sure you keep your smile longer than shorter in duration. A study by School of Psychology at Cardiff University found that a smile that happens slowly or a “slow onset smile” produced more positive feelings by the other person looking at you. You will be seen as more attractive and more trustworthy to women.
3. Failing To “Dress to Impress”
Match.com found one of the biggest first date mistakes made by men is their choice in attire. A Match.com survey found 7 out of 10 women will look at your clothing and judge as to whether or not you are a “suitable mate.” USA Today published results of a survey where 58% of single women judge you on your choice of clothes.
As soon as a woman sees you she will judge you based on your clothes. Yes, this means before you even open your mouth to say “hello” she’s judging you. Wear something nice when you meet. Something stylish.
This, of course, depends on where you are meeting. If you are meeting for happy hour at a nice place you should wear something nice.
You don’t have to be Mr. GQ and wear a suit but you know what nice clothes are. Ditch the Hurley t-shirt and torn jeans. The Match.com survey recommends you wear a fine V-neck sweater, a crisp, button-down shirt, and tailored dark wash jeans for a sharp look.
If you are meeting for happy hour at a place like Applebee’s, you can dress down but you don’t want to appear to be a slob. You want to be presentable.
If you have female friends ask them for advice. I have zero fashion sense. I have no problem taking a female friend with me when I buy clothes. You should do the same.
If you can’t get a female to go with you, have one on call so you can try clothes on and take a picture then send a selfie to ask her opinion.
4. Bad Language
This isn’t about swearing, it’s about your grammar. 90% of women will judge you by how you speak. A poll by USA today found 69% of women judge you on grammar as well. Use proper English. Communicate like an adult.
You don’t have to quote Shakespeare here, but you should come across as having command of the vocabulary.
Intelligence is a turn on to women so you must show you have command of the English language. Reading books can help improve your communication. Think before you speak; don’t be the guy who says the first thing that comes into your head. Take a moment and pay attention to what you’re about to say. This could help avoid putting your foot in your mouth.
5. Your Shoes
Women not only judge your clothes but also what’s on your feet; your shoes. Footwear designer Allen Edmonds surveyed 1,000 American men and women and found women judge a man’s shoes twice as much as men judge women’s. They also found:
- 64% of women judge a man’s fashion sense based on his shoes.
- 52% of women say they judge a man’s personality by his shoes.
- 36% say they use shoes to determine a man’s financial position.
- 54% say men’s shoes reflect a guy’s attention to detail.
Leave the Converse or Vans at home; a nice pair of shoes is your best option. You can wear a nice pair of black loafers. They work with everything. Be sure to shine them beforehand because when people get nervous, they tend to look down.
So, if she looks at your shoes and sees scuffed dirty shoes, you won’t make a good impression. And don’t wear sandals unless you’re meeting at the beach.
6. Keep Your Phone In Your Pants Pocket
Checking your phone is one of the worst first date mistakes men make according to Match.com. 75% of women see checking your phone as a turnoff.
Would you be annoyed if a woman and was constantly checking her phone on a date with you? Hell yes, you would. It’s disrespectful. So show her some respect and keep your phone in your pocket.
Checking your phone shows you aren’t interested in her. This is the last thing you want her to think. Unless you are a doctor on call, put your phone on Airplane mode and keep it in your pocket until the date is over.
7. Showing Up LateArrive on Time
Never be “fashionably late” to your first date. In fact, don’t be one minute late. First impressions are everything and another of the biggest first date mistakes a guy can make is to show up late.
Showing up late on your first date sends a bad message; she isn’t a priority. If you can’t make it to your first date on time, she’ll think you won’t be there when she really needs you. Remember, women analyze everything on the first date so be timely.
Also, you should meet her outside wherever your date is. If it’s coffee, drinks, food, or some sort of venue, meet her out front. You want to meet her out front and so you can guide her in instead of having her look for you in some crowded bar or restaurant.
Lastly, I know sometimes things happen and you may end up late regardless. Maybe traffic is bad, there’s an accident, or you forgot you had to stop and get gas for your car. Things out of your control may happen.
If they do, call her and give her a heads up before your meeting time. If she’s already there call the hostess and ask her to bring your date a glass of wine. It shows you care.
Please leave a comment below because I’d like to hear what you think about first date mistakes that men make.
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