Why Do Men Get No Responses On POF
The main reasons you get no responses on POF are bad openers, negativity, and lousy profile photos, to name a few. There are many reasons you're not seeing success on the app, but the good news is it's fixable.
This post shares the top 10 reasons women ignore men on Plentyoffish. You'll discover the most common blunders guys make on the app.
If you are struggling and need help getting responses on POF, check you aren't making the mistakes below. Fixing the blunders on this post will immediately improve your results overnight.
- Lazy, boring, one-sided icebreakers.
- Complimenting a woman's appearance.
- Using bad photos in your profile.
- Your bio shows a lack of effort.
- Showing a negative attitude.
- Mentioning your social media handle in your bio.
- Using clichés in your bio.
- Saying you're something but not showing it.
- Stop mentioning how busy you are.
- Bad grammar kills your results!
1. Lazy, boring, one-sided icebreakers.
Most men on Plentoffish send terrible openers that aren't engaging for women. Below is an example of the typical icebreaker women receive on the app.
Most men send low-effort openers on POF.
Lazy openers like the one above will connect with hardly any women, and the biggest reason you get no responses on POF. Unfortunately, low-effort openers are commonplace on POF - other examples include:
- Hey there
- How are you today?
- Hi
- How's your weekend?
- Hello
If you use approaches like these, you deserve to be ignored on POF. Low-effort icebreakers make the worst first impression possible.
Solution: The best way to start a conversation is by showing effort. Anything in a woman's profile is fair game for your opener - her bio, photos, and headline, for example.
Below is a message to Stephanie, who has a photo of herself playing guitar in her profile. I focus on that in my icebreaker, and she responds.
Ask about something in a woman's profile helps get responses.
Take the time to craft a good icebreaker. Women are more likely to respond to messages that show curiosity and effort.
2. Complimenting a woman's appearance.
The most common opener for men on POF is typically a low-effort approach ("hey," "how are you," and "how's your day"). The second most common opener is complimenting a woman's appearance.
Complimenting a woman's appearance doesn't work.
Complimenting a woman's looks is a terrible idea, and it's the default way men compliment women on the app. Physical compliments are not effective at getting responses.
Why is this a bad approach? Because it shows women you can't take the time to read their profile and only value their appearance.
Women are bombarded with physical compliments, so your message won't stand out. You will immediately be lumped in with the masses and ignored.
The best way to compliment a woman on POF is to focus on the non-physical. Look at her bio or photos for ways to compliment her.
Below is a message to Carrie where I start the icebreaker complimenting her energy. After the compliment, I pivot the message to her love of swimming found in her bio.
Use non-physical compliments in your icebreakers.
You can compliment a woman and make a great first impression in many other ways. Examples include:
- I like your style
- I love your verbal vibe
- I love your sense of humor
Compliments like the examples above will open more doors than telling a woman she's pretty. As long as your compliment is sincere, you'll get positive results.
3. Using bad photos in your profile.
One of the top reasons you may not get responses on POF is because of bad pictures. Women judge you based on the pictures in your portfolio.
You must use photos that showcase your lifestyle and interests. And for goodness' sake, look at the camera and smile.
The reality is men use terrible photos in their profiles. Here are common photo mistakes men make on POF:
- You don't smile. The first thing women look at is your smile, so look at the camera and show some teeth.
- Bathroom selfies. Women do not want to see your bathroom or, worse, a public restroom.
- Car selfies. These types of photos never prompt women to send a message. Do you think women will ask, "Hey, where were you driving in this picture?"
- Photos alongside women. Standing (or sitting) next to a female takes the focus away from you, which is the last thing you want on POF.
- Photos with children. This type of photo is an instant "no" for women. Protect your children's anonymity and keep them out of your profile photos.
- Photos you're not physically in. Avoid using pictures of your car, food, dog, sunsets, etc. Don't use any photo where you're not in it.
- No full-body pictures. Women want to see you head-to-toe. Women suspect you're hiding your body if you don't include one full-body photo.
- Be presentable. Include at least one picture dressed up somewhat. Think of what you would wear meeting a woman for a drink.
All it takes is one of the photos above to cause women to swipe left on your profile. If you use any, remove them immediately.
4. Your bio shows a lack of effort.
If you think women only care about your pictures, you're mistaken. Women read your bio on Plentyoffish.
You must put effort into your bio because it balances out your entire profile. Share your interests, passions, hobbies, or goals in your bio.
Unsurprisingly, most men get no responses on POF when their bio shows little effort. Below is the typical guy's bio on the app.
A short profile is a red flag on Plentyoffish.
If your bio is like the example above, you won't find success on the app. A short bio shows women you aren't serious about meeting someone.
Don't think you'll meet many women on POF with a poorly written bio. What's funny is that it's easy to create a great bio.
Do you like traveling? Write a sentence or two sharing recent travel adventures. Maybe you love trying new restaurants. Share a recommendation of a newly discovered place and ask for one.
Tip: Do you need help writing about yourself? A good tip for writing about yourself is adding the word "because," after a topic you enjoy.
For example, say you love traveling, as I mention above. Write in your bio, "I enjoy traveling because" and then follow up with the reasons.
If you really enjoy something, the words should flow out easily. The trick above will help you if you struggle to describe yourself.
A well-written profile gets comments from women.
A bio with depth will help you stand out and gets you more matches. All you need to do is share 3-5 of your interests with a short explanation of each topic.
5. Showing a negative attitude.
Showing negativity in your profile is a huge red flag and the kiss of death. It shows women you're angry and jaded, and it is not an attractive trait.
Plentyoffish surveyed over 2,000 singles and found negativity was among the top "buzzkills." The app recommends "stop writing checklists on what you're not looking for in a partner, instead focus on the positives and what you'd love to do on a first date, or what you'd like to chat about."
It's best to be 100% positive in your profile - you want to make women smile and pique their curiosity. Your profile should give off a friendly vibe.
Never share any frustrations in your profile. Take it out at the gym, go outside and get some fresh air, or get off the app.
Women don't want to date men who show hostility in their profiles. Your goal is to show women you're a catch - a negative profile does the opposite.
Avoid any negativity in your profile.
6. Mentioning your social media handle in your bio.
Keep your Social Media off your profile because you won't be taken seriously. Women may think you're on POF to promote yourself and looking for followers.
It seems more and more men think it's OK to tell women to look you up on Social Media. Women aren't going to look you up, especially if your profile is bad.
A common mistake I see on POF is men sharing their Snapchat or Instagram in their profiles. It's best to match with someone and create a connection by engaging in a great conversation.
Once there's a connection, I recommend getting a woman's number so you can talk or text. It's best to keep women off your social media until you've met them.
7. Using clichés in your bio.
Never use clichés in your bio - they add no value. Using a cliche is the same as writing, "I have nothing original to say."
There is an overreliance on clichés in men's bios. They don't work because they are unoriginal, lazy, and offer zero insight into who you are as a man.
Clichés are a dime a dozen on POF. Common examples you'll find in men's profiles include:
- I look young for my age
- Not her for hookups
- I'm fluent in sarcasm
- Just ask
- I love to laugh
- My kids/family are my world
- I enjoy nights out but staying in
- My kids come first
- Swipe left if you (fill in the blank)
Phrases like those above offer no benefit. You want a bio that helps create a connection with women reading it, and overused phrases don't help one bit.
No woman is going to see, "I love to laugh," and think to herself, "Wow, I love to laugh too... We're a match!" She'll roll her eyes, think, "how unoriginal," and bypass you.
Take a look at your bio and remove anything that isn't original. I guarantee using clichés is a huge reason you get no responses on POF.
8. Saying you're something but not showing it.
A common mistake on POF is sharing a bunch of traits you have but failing to show them in your profile. You can do this through your photos or description in your bio.
Below is an all too common example of this problem. Jeremy says he's funny, fun, and adventurous, but where's the proof?
Words are meaningless without proof.
Jeremy makes the classic profile blunder, claiming to be funny, yet his bio is not humorous. Note he also mentions his social media in his bio.
Your profile (or photos) must show whatever you say you are. For example, if you say you love traveling, you better include a picture of yourself traveling or describe a recent adventure in your bio.
Do you mention that you're adventurous? It's best to have a photo zip-lining or kayaking. You can also share adventurous things you do in your free time.
9. Stop mentioning how busy you are.
A common blunder men make on POF is writing how busy they are, but will make time for the right person. Telling women you're a busy guy isn't a selling point.
Never share how busy you are in your dating profile.
Note how Ernesto starts his profile by sharing that he's a busy guy - he also spells "a lot" wrong. It's the first thing women see and makes a horrible first impression.
There's no benefit to including you're a busy man anywhere in your profile. Everyone has commitments, so keep it off your bio.
10. Bad grammar kills your results!
A huge red flag for women is a profile filled with grammar mistakes. 1,000 women were polled by the website Word Tips, and 45% said they wouldn't be interested in someone who is "very physically attractive but used improper grammar or spelling
Grammar mistakes shows you're uneducated. It also shows you don't care what women think about you.
Bad grammar is an instant turnoff for women.
You don't want any grammar errors in your profile. It's one of the lesser-known blunders men make on POF.
The good news is it's easy to fix grammar mistakes. Here are two steps for checking the grammar in your bio:
- Read your bio out loud. The key is hearing yourself as your read it. You'll catch poor sentence structure. Revise if needed. Repeat until it sounds good.
- Once you're satisfied, use a grammar tool to check the spelling. I recommend Grammarly.
It only takes a few minutes to check your profile and ensure it's mistake-free. One misspelled word can be catastrophic to your results, so follow the two steps above.
Final Thoughts
It's easy to identify why men get no responses on POF. The examples in this post are the top blunders I see on the app.
Go through the post, point by point, and check if you make any of the mistakes above. All it takes is one mistake to cause your results to plummet.
If you're looking for more help, visit my one-stop resource that focuses on these POF topics:
- The best photos for your profile on POF.
- How to create a great POF Profile headline.
- Conversation starters on POF.
- The best way to showcase your Interests section.
- How to fix your profile on POF.