Why You Are Rejected By A Girl Online

The reason women reject you is simple; you are making mistakes in your messages or on your dating profile. A common frustration with women is that a lot of men are clueless. I’m going to show you how you can avoid being a clueless online dater.

You may not realize it, but your messages or profile cause you to be rejected by a girl instantly. But what is it you ask?

A post on Reddit asked women, “what are things that guys do that makes women instantly reject them on dating sites?”

I sorted through the women’s responses and came up with 5 common reasons why men, and possibly you, are constantly being rejected by a girl.

Each of the reasons below are actual answers from women. Take note fellas.

1. Sexual Messages

The quickest way for your message to be deleted is to mention sex or anything sexual for that matter. Any type of innuendo will cause you to be instantly rejected by a girl.

Women say:
“I’ve gotten at least 20 “hey milf wanna fuck” type messages. Just… no.”
“Hey bby wnt some fukk..”
“Anything sexual.”
“Bragging about the size of their penises [including sending dick pics].”
“Asking me intimacy or sex related questions right away.”
“Anything sexual as an opener or within the first couple messages.”
“Anything sexual mentioned.”
“…any sexual comment on the first message..”
“Mentions or has a preference for casual sex.”
“Asking for nudes and/or sending unsolicited dick pics.”

2. Using Pet Names

If a woman shares her name on her profile, address her by her name. If she doesn’t share her name on her dating profile, there’s no need to call her “baby”, “darling”, or any other pet name you think of. It’s not appropriate. It’s not endearing. It simply makes you look like a creep.

Women say:
“Calling me “babe” or “baby” or “sexy” or anything other than my name.”
“Giving me a nickname right off the bat [babe, baby, sexy, etc.. etc..]”
“Calling me babe/baby. Just, no. My profile had my name in it, you do NOT need to call me that.”

3. Lame Openers

One word or single sentence opening messages show a complete lack of effort. If you think “hey” is a great opening message to a woman, then you deserve to be rejected by a girl.

Comment on something on her profile. Anything. Commenting on something she wrote about in her profile will show you made at least some effort.

Women say:
“Hi”
“Hey beautiful”
“Boring openers (hey. what’s up. etc.)”
“Only a basic compliment as an opener. (You’re pretty. Nice eyes.)”
“…anything that is boring or one line. i.e. “hey, what’s up?” Do y’all know how many messages we get on Tinder a day? It’s ridiculous. If you want to stand out–start a real conversation.”
“Single line/word messages like “hi” or “how are you”
“Simple “what’s up?” message. At least start a dialogue. Ask an open-ended question.”
“Hi sexy”
“…do you know how gorgeous you are?”

4. Bad Grammar

Always spellcheck your dating profile and your messages to women. Bad grammar is a turnoff to women.

As I pointed out in a previous blog post, Why Grammar is critical in your Dating Profile About Me Section, Match.com found 69% of women judged men most on the grammar in their profile. Zoosk found that spelling errors in your dating profile result in 13% fewer messages from women

Also, avoid texting lingo (lol, rofl).

Women say:
“Anything with over say 25% spelling errors.”
“Misspellings, horrible grammar, or txt typing.”
“…stupid spelling errors.”

5. You Are Annoying

There’s no need to send messages over and over and over to women. One message is great. If she doesn’t respond, wait a few days and send a second message. If she doesn’t respond to that message, move on. She’s not interested.

Women say:
“…also messaging over and over with things like ‘are you there’ is very annoying and needy and will result in an instaban from me.”
“…10 messages in a row…”
“…a 5 paragraph long love letter…”

Bonus Reasons You Got Rejected by a Girl

Don’t think women have issues with just the 5 reasons above. There are a lot of reasons your may find yourself instantly rejected by a girl on a dating site. Here are a few more examples women have with men online:

Women say:
“Asking for sexier pics right away.”
“…if their profile says “ladies please message me first” or anything similar.”
“Netflix and wine on Friday nights. Every fucking person with access to Netflix and wine does that to relax.
Likes to travel – So does everyone else.”
“No fat chicks!”
“I don’t want to do this…” (Then why are you here?)”
“If you want to take a chance on me…”
“…politics I disagree with…”
“Asking to see me right away [clearly to hook up].”
“Anything that ends in “for a black girl.”
“When they have lists of don’t message me if statements on their profile. It comes off bitter and judgmental to me.”
“In a profile: anything that attacks groups of women. i.e. “Don’t bother to message me if you’re shallow/vain/stuck-up.”
“Any greeting with a compliment about my looks. Automatic turn off.”

Final Thoughts

If you don’t want to send a message that gets you instantly rejected by a girl simply message her in a positive light and have something to say. It’s that simple.

Avoid anything sexual. Never compliment her on anything physical. Ask her questions that show you read her profile. Use good grammar and treat her with respect.

It’s shocking how most men do none of this. Take it from examples that women shared on the Reddit post. Use this information to your advantage.

If you consistently send messages that are unanswered or find women check out your profile and never write you, it’s you and not the women. Tweak your messages and step outside your comfort zone when emailing women. You may find that these types of approaches will get you positive results.



Leave your comments below. I would love to hear what you have to say about the topic of being rejected by a girl on a dating site.