First Date Advice for Men

You’ve put in all the work necessary to set up your first date with that hot girl from Match.com

You created a great dating profile, traded a few messages, got her number, and set up the first date. Now comes time for the date itself.

First impressions are everything. You need to show her you’re a real man and not another entry in her long list of sad sack losers she’s met in the past.

If you want to get a kiss or take her home at the end of the night instead of a handshake, follow my first date advice below.

1. Don’t Be a Nice Guy

Some first date advice you should already know is to stop being a nice guy.

This was my biggest problem when I started dating.

Yes, I was the “nice guy”. I was there to lend an ear and be completely polite and agreeable. When the date ended, I got the dreaded handshake or the occasional hug.

I learned quickly that being nice get you nowhere.

I’m sure you’ve seen women who write on their dating profiles they want a “nice guy”.

That’s bull-you-know-what.

You don’t need to a nice guy to get the girl.

It doesn’t mean you should be a jerk.

It means to be confident and assertive. Manners are important but don’t be a wuss.

A study by “ The Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin ” found men are less attractive if they seem too caring.

This means to listen to her but don’t OVERDO it when it comes to sharing your feelings. If you do, you run the risk of being a “nice guy”.

And we all know the equation:

Nice Guy = NO Attraction = NO chance = NO sex

My first date advice is to tease her, challenge her, have fun with her. Just don’t sit there and agree with everything she says.

2. Have a plan

Assume the woman you are meeting is going to have a good time and want to continue the date with you.

My second piece of first date advice is to pick a place that has other fun, interesting things within walking distance so that you can continue the date.

I live in San Diego. There are plenty of neighborhoods that have bars, museums, yogurt shops, pool halls, etc.., all near each other.

I would always set a first date at a bar and if it went well, would continue the date to another bar, shoot some pool, walk along the beach, explore an art museum, etc…

You get the idea; pick an area where there are other things you can do after you meet. Something centrally located so that you have options.

3. Be Punctual

My third piece of first date advice is to never be “fashionably late”. In fact, don’t be late period! Be early.

First impressions are everything.

If you show up late you are sending a bad message that she isn’t a priority.

If you are late to your first date, she’ll think you won’t be there when she really needs you.

Remember, women analyze everything about you on the first date so be on time.

Also, you should meet her outside wherever your date is.

If it’s coffee, drinks, food, or some sort of venue, meet her out front.

Don’t make her look for you in some crowded bar or restaurant. Be a man and meet her out front and then you can guide her in.

And lastly, I know sometimes things happen and you may end up late regardless.

Maybe traffic is bad, there’s an accident, or you forgot you needed gas and had to stop and fill up your tank. Things out of your control may happen.

If they do, CALL her and give her a heads up before your meeting time.

If she’s already there call the hostess and ask her to bring your date a glass of wine. It shows you care.

4. Behave!

Another piece of first date advice is you should be on good behavior on the first date.

This doesn’t mean to be agreeable and a wimp (see “nice guy” section above).

It means to be a gentleman.

Give her the best seat when you sit down. Typically this is where she faces the entire room.

If you order a bottle of wine, invite her to taste it first.

Don’t get DRUNK! Limit yourself to a drink or two. Let me repeat, NEVER get drunk.

If you order a drink get a glass of water too. Be sure to order her a glass of water as well. Be a gentleman remember?

Every time you take a sip of your drink, take a sip to two sips of water. It will help pace yourself.

When you get up to use the restroom say “Excuse me” first. You won’t believe how many men get up and say “I gotta go to the bathroom” without excusing themselves. Show some class.

Be polite to the staff. There’s no need to be rude. Being an asshole is never impressive.

If something is wrong with your order handle it immediately but be positive with the staff.

If you order food, offer her a bite of your food but do not take from her plate unless she offers.

Behaviors like these will separate you from the rest of the guys who blow it on their first date.

5. You Pay for the First Date

My last piece of first date advice is that you pay for the first date if you ask her out.

I always suggest drinks or coffee. Nothing more. An appetizer or two is cool if you are comfortable with that but never dinner.

If you decide to take a woman to dinner for a first date that’s your call. Choose a place that fits within your financial means.

Remember, you are paying for the first date. Splitting a bill on the first date sends the message “friend zone”.

Most women will offer to pay, maybe even reach for their purse. If they do offer you some money, don’t get offended and definitely don’t take her money.

This is where “having a plan” from above comes in handy. You can simply tell her “I got the drinks here, you can get me a drink at the bar next door” or “I got the drinks, you get the first game of pool down the street.”

I’ve never had a woman respond “no.”

Good luck!

Please leave a comment below because I’d like to hear what you think about my first date advice.



First Date Advice Photos:
“Let’s Celebrate. Young Couple – Man And Woman” image courtesy of stockimages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net
“First Date Calendar Displays Seeing Somebody And Romance” image courtesy of at FreeDigitalPhotos.net